You Make It, I Take It
“The striking thing about all consumer products — and none more so than electronic devices and applications — is that they’re designed to be immensely likable. This is, in fact, the definition of a consumer product, in contrast to the product that is simply itself and whose makers aren’t fixated on your liking it. (I’m thinking here of jet engines, laboratory equipment, serious art and literature.)”Liking Is for Cowards. Go for What Hurts.
By Jonathan Franzen, NY Times 28 Sat 2011
TOTAL DETROIT
Association
WALK DETROIT!
BuildingsofDetroit.com is a two-person effort by historians, author Dan Austin and photographer Sean Doerr to spread awareness of Detroit’s architectural history.
Dream Five
- At the beginning I was experiencing the dream from the perspective of a 22 year old Caucasian woman. With me was her 6 year old sister. By the end of the dream I was there as well as the 22 y/o, the 6 y/o, and we had been joined by a 20 something Caucasian man who had come to hurt us or steal belongings left behind. He was now helping us to survive.
- We were in a very large Victorian house in an abandoned neighborhood (was it a Detroit neighborhood?). The neighborhood had been purged of its inhabitants.
- The youngest liked to play games, and I was constantly having to get her to quiet down – to understand the severity of the situation.
- We never thought about food or water. We were always thinking about games and dancing and sometimes even watching TV. But we had to make sure no one knew we were there. So there was a constant attempt to cover the windows with sheets or slats or whatever we could find.
- At one point a bus filled with prisoners was let loose in the neighborhood. It was terrifying, but I knew that we could persevere.
IT
OUT OF CONTEXT- this quote provides a very exciting point of entry for contemporary performance, literary and visual art:
“To understand what it has to offer, one must learn how to read it. [It] is not a textbook, but is like an ocean with waves and currents and eddies and whirlpools and quiet caves. It calls for suspending one’s normal mode of conceptual progress until one has discovered where the tides and techniques of this new medium will carry him. Water is, to man, a distorting element, and probably whatever he sees in it will not be seen as it really is. The ecstatic surges in his body as he rides the swells will not be forgotten after he has found his feet once again on the sand. Like riding the waves, or listening to great music, this [it] wafts one to where he can perceive reality in new configurations that unite the subjective and the objective. It does not so much convey specific fact as arrange science, myth, philosophy and poetic narrative in peculiar combinations which can generate remarkable experiences…”
F.T.L.
F.T.L. Abbreviation of: Follow The Leader
425D’s First Short Film
Help! Watch 425D’s short film and win us Free Space!
Simply click here, watch our submission to the end and you bring us one step closer to winning free rehearsal space at Space on White. Be entertained and inspired, all for a good cause.
What is 425D? Watch our film to find out!
425D: Space on White
a commission by Jordan Seavey
directed by Stephen Brackett, Lauren Keating, Niegel Smith and Awoye Timpo
featuring: Jocelyn Bio as Niegel, Stephanie Dimaggio as Lauren, Lucas Kavner as Stephen and Bonna Tek & Margo Hammond as Awoye
Poetry is for Muses
walking around town taking photos or sitting
by the lake freeballing doing nothing maybe grunting
an expletive or two
when the spirit moves us…
I love you dude – I fucking love you
Remembrances of Things Past
Very excited about heading into rehearsals tomorrow morning for NEIGHBORS – a brilliant new play by Branden Jacobs-Jenkins. But before I do, I’m going to take small pause for reflection and remembering…
Hanging With My Sweet Niece
Tasty Holiday Cookies
Bundled Up in the Subway
and Meeting New Folks.
QUOTEd
NY TIMES Opinionator Blog: Into the Closet
“Like it or not we will be well into the 22nd century before lesbian and gay Americans finally have their equal rights unless they get busy burning cities this century. That is what I’m afraid it will finally take. Ask a Black friend or relative about it.”
Wyman Elrod
Dallas Texas, January 15, 2010
Paris Fin!
                            fin fin fin fin fin fin
                                  fin fin fin fin fin
                                        fin fin fin fin
                                              fin fin fin
                                                    fin fin
                                                          fin
                                                  fin fin fin fin fin fin
                                                  fin fin fin fin fin
                                                  fin fin fin fin
                                                  fin fin fin
                                                  fin fin
                                                  fin
Paris Quatre
DIRTY WORD: SUCCESS
One reason for this time away is to reflect on and demystify my personal definition of success. Somehow, my understanding of success has been overburdened by certain personal, familial and social expectations: to be at the forefront of my field, to earn “lots” of money, to take care of my family, to give back to the community, to be an engaged, informed citizen, to be selfless and self actualizing, to blaze a path for all my communities, to be “happy,” to inspire.
I hope that this process allows me to distill these expectations and to better articulate a personally fulfilling and sustainable vision of success. I start with this litany.
Artistic Integrity
-Unity, Balance, Contrast, Proportion, Variety, Rhythm-Holding myself to a RIGOROUS AESTHETIC process that centers on an intellectual and emotional consideration of COMPOSITION (line, form, depth, color and text), HISTORY (a focused research of past and present objects, soundscapes, gestures, rituals, histories, laws, etc.), and SPACE (a unique environment where the compositions and histories intermingle across time and media)
-Asking CRITICAL QUESTIONS of myself, collaborators and audiences about state, culture or identity
-Inspiring DIALOGUE by acknowledging and implicating the audience
-Imparting SKILLS and ACTION by offering the audience space to create or respond
Financial Stability
-Pursuing and choosing projects that provide the FINANCIAL FREEDOM to pay my bills, afford rest/rejuvination, invest in relationships and accrue emergency savings of at least 10 percent of my income, annually-Contributing an additional 10 percent of my income to a LOW-RISK RETIREMENT SAVINGS, annually
Disciplined Rest, Rejuvenation and Reflection
-Scheduling, planning and saving for substantial BREAKS BETWEEN PROJECTS-Going on at least two NON-WORK TRIPS every year
-Committing to weekly time for WRITING, SILENCE, SOLITUDE, and THERAPY
Enduring, Intimate Relationships
-Preparing and sharing MEALS-Being FORTHCOMING with my fears, anticipations and reflections
-Planning and following through with INDIVIDUAL dates with friends and family. These dates should not be for work related events – but should occur in spaces or involve activities that inspire us to be fearless, trustworthy and supportive of one another
He’s Baaaaack
Yo yo yo – so, the last several months have been challenging and exciting and empowering. Bill T. Jones has been pushing me and the company of FELA! to make the best possible work we could ever achieve. He’s phenomenal and has lead us toward great art making. I’m sincerely thankful. And I hope many folks get to see FELA! on broadway.
10 weeks of rehearsals (5 
of which coincided with previews – rehearsals during the day, shows at night) have left me with such intimate relationships with the entire company and with Fela’s world and music. The room of artists that Bill and our producer Steve brought together was in constant creative motion – making and remaking and cutting and adding and pushing and sharing and thinking and throwing down. Whew – if every process could be this wrought with commitment, I’d never hunger.
Anywho – a post a little less diary like and a little less gushy to come – but needed to get this one out.
Love and selah!
Niegel
Commentator
A response to: Dude, You’ve Got Problems
“ I went to a conference on bisexuality about 15 years ago. A woman there said to me, “I wish you gay men would stop putting your energy into fighting homophobia and instead put your energy into eradicating misogyny. Because the problem society has with gay men isn’t that they’re with other men – it’s that they’re men who are “acting like women.” If it were ok to be a woman in this culture, homophobia would just disappear.” I think she’s right.”
Dude, You’ve Got Problems
Hmmm…. her argument isn’t very prismatic “fighting misogyny in stead of homophobia” and her conclusion is a bit simplistic “homophobia would disappear.” But I do think that there is a very insightful observation in this quote. When we step outside of prescribed gender roles it disrupts the dominant culture. I welcome the challenge to shift. I’d argue that by emulating, celebrating and nurturing complex gender expression we will “fight” both misogyny and homophobia.
Commentator
I think the sagging pants style is remarkable and may be 
unprecedented in the history of fashion because it combines not just a static piece of clothing, the pants, but also the drama that goes along with the possibility of the pants falling. And then there’s the concomitant activity of hitching and slipping and hitching and slipping. For those of us who find young men sexy the style is compelling. It seems like a lot of work to wear your pants this way but for the viewer it is dynamic, entertaining and just really fun. Name me another clothing style that involves so much theater.
All Over My Face
hot gay artist sings about a hot gay lifestyle with inclusive gay groupies all over gay new york
hot & gay
yeah
hot gay yeah yeah yeah
Upcoming from Permiso
Dear Friends,
Todd Shalom & Niegel Smith (Permiso)
invite you to join us
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
and Wednesday, March 18, 2009
at The Public Theater
425 Lafayette St., New York, NY
Performances will begin at:
7:30pm, 8:00pm, 8:30pm & 9:00pm
RESERVATIONS REQUIRED.
To make a reservation, please visit:
http://www.brownpapertickets.
Love,
Niegel & Todd
Rest in peace Andrew Wyeth.
The artist who created one of the most stunning American paintings has moved on, passed on, let loose, newly breathed, withered, exasperated, floated away into … what? I don’t know.
It is strange.
He painted a world that was not mine – not my experience, not my private history nor the history of my forefathers, but uniquely bound up in my sense of self – my nation identity. In his detail and specificity he reminded me of the individual stories within a distinct culture which contribute to the richness/tapestry/multiplicity/layering/cocooning/budding/germinating/honeycombing/mounding/melting pot/box of chocolates/hope chests/collection plate that is our America.
Glimpsing into the struggles – the wood framed homes, obviously built by hand, the pastures plowed so knowingly/expertly, the simple coverings masquerading as clothing – offers an insight into a hearty American work ethic that I like to acknowledge as something I know intimately- though distinctly different than anyone in his paintings.
In his worlds, he revealed something common and something admirable in the human spirit.
Thankfully for us, he felt compelled to record those revelations in paintings. Paintings which will continue to inspire us – to force us to reconsider our connection to the land and our potential as reflecting beings.
A print of his painting: Christina’s World (one of my most favored possessions and a gift from my friend Akin) hangs in my room. It is a reminder, a recording, a document, a gift, a loan, a testament, a poem, a lullaby, a treasure, a friend, a contradiction, a.
His New York Times Obituary is here.
QUOTEd
NY TIMES LETTERS: Does the E-Book Have a Promising Future
“…still, I myself take pleasure in stroking the page of a book …”
Sam Goodyear
Oneonta, N.Y., Dec. 24, 2008
Dreaming
In this post, instead of my usual “dream five” – i attempt to transcribe the total experience of my dream last night. Please comment: is it clear? is it too confusing in the unabridged version? I never know what the right balance is for a blog post. I also have chosen not to change anyone’s name. It’s a dream – so everyone is innocent.
CHOOSING EDUCATION, CHOOSING COMMUNITY
a dream transcription
Inside a subway train?
Mandy, an Associate Artistic Director: You don’t want to make plays with undergrads. It was great, but they aren’t professionals. You want to achieve so much more.
I need to get out of the subway train. I need to run from underground. I need to emerge into the light and the fresh air.
***location shift***
A meeting: Bill T. Jones, Jim Lewis, some Producers/Donors, AJ, is this for FELA or a new project? I’m feeling stifled. I feel like crying. I need to work in education. I run outside.
Cast member: (with glee) Tears!
I know they (some cast members) are talking about me. I run around the corner and finish crying. When I’m done, I go back to the meeting which is in an underground restaurant – at a round table covered with a very fine white cotton tablecloth.
Bill: (implying I’m late) Nice of you to join us.
Me: I was stuffy and needed to blow my nose. (why couldn’t I have asked someone here for a napkin)
Jim: (Hands me a bowl of soup.)
***location shift***
Super Mario Galaxy: I open a “new world,” but in order to play it I have to loose all 22 lives I already have. I decide to go into a “previous world,” but I’m ceaselessly chased in that “previous world.” The characters chase me into the real world. Why didn’t I decide to just open the “new world?” The “new world” was vivid yellows and purples and greens and reds – very very vivid – why didn’t I choose it instead?). Who cares if I would have lost all my lives except for one, I wouldn’t have been pursued by the characters in the world I decided to open up.
***location shift***
A sculpture/dance hall: presenting work.
***location shift***
A stage: in an auditorium. The auditorium was in a building, on a small lane (like European towns) cobblestone, skinny buildings crammed together. But I knew it to be Greenpoint, the neighborhood I live in – in real life. I was directing a community production of a play (Streetcar Named Desire? No, a new play much like it). It starred people from my community – people I knew really well, people I wanted to succeed. But one of the actors was out (sick?), and I had to play her roll. My scene partner missed his cue, but Hilton Als – who had become a fan of the show – was in the audience and yelled out his cue. It changed the whole feeling of the last part of the show. I was struggling to read my lines, which I couldn’t see and were hidden from audience view. I fell to the ground but kept it in character. I played the rest of the scene in partial view of the audience. It was terrifying.
***location shift***
After the end of the show I went next door to a new restaurant. It was opened by Liza (who just permanently closed Queen’s Hideaway in Greenpoint). At the her new restaurant, they were serving hot mexican soups. The chef (a very old mexican man who knew english better than I did) and the waiter (a very young mexican immigrant) nurtured me and spoke to me and told me about their sister restaurant next door (which Liza also owned) that served only hot soups! After finishing my soup I decided to go next door.
***location shift***
The cold soup restaurant: was below ground. They had dug out a little patio – making an open air, basement level piazza, complete with a large fountain in front of the main door. Behind the main door was a little foyer with yet another door that dazzled with white and silver etching and framing. I went inside and the staff was still preparing. They were going to open the cold soup restaurant the next day – because cold soup (I surmised) took longer to marinate thank hot soup. Liza was nowhere to be found, but I walked in the kitchen anyway. I saw the beautiful radishes, partially grated for their zest, lemons grated for zest, someone chopping bunches of long stemmed onions. Brilliant colors: purple, yellow, greens, whites. It was almost as though my eyes could take close up shots of all the foods.
Niegel: (to myself) they must all be organic
Sous Chef 1: What are you doing here?
Niegel: I’m a friend of Liza’s.
Sous Chef 2 (a black lady with a tattoo (of a star?) on her right cheek): You’re not supposed to be here yet. We open tomorrow.
Niegel: I know, but I wanted to see what you were up to. Did you work at Liza’s old restaurant?
Sous Chef 2: I don’t remember. I may have. I don’t remember.
Sous Chef 1: You should really leave now.
As I leave, I can sense that the head chef can see me as I’m leaving. He checks to make sure I don’t steal the keys from the door.
***location shift***
Back at the theater: My scene partner from earlier is checking on the giant muffins. We are in the cafe of the theater – where they serve giant muffins. I attempt to apologize for my performance (wow it’s hard being an actor). He seems to hear me but doesn’t acknowledge my apology. He is proud to have just gotten to work with me. His friends have gotten him a gift. It is a peach pie – brilliant brown – and they are pouring a fresh orange juice around the outside of the pie. (they’ve prepared a moat of sorts between the center of the pie and the crust.) He is loved. I hug him. He thanks me.
Niegel: I hope I get to work with you again. I never even imagined that you were an actor.
Friend: I did it once in high school. Thank you for this opportunity. It was wonderful. Please think of me next time you direct a community play.
Niegel: (truly moved – almost to tears)
Niegel: (to myself) Will I think of him? Will I direct another community play?
Still at the theater: Because I acted in the show, I’m now on the email list for the actors. I don’t just get new emails though: my iphone downloads all the previous emails too and in them I see my friend’s questions about the show, about the profession and his praise for my leadership. After reading three messages, I notice that he is a bit embarrassed. So I promise not to read anymore. I feel a stronger connection to him than I’ve felt to anyone in a long time. We hug again.
I remember that I need to wake up and try to look past the edges of the dream.
I wake up.
COULDN’T SAY IT BETTER…
…a new addition to my blog.
“[the] target audience is the 10 percent of voters who told this week’s New York Times/CBS News poll that they did not feel as if they had received enough information to make an informed decision on the presidential race. I believe we have met them before. They are the men and women who get up at a town hall meeting after the candidate had just made a 20-minute opening speech about his/her plans for health care reform, and say: “What I want to know is, what are you going to do about medical costs?” My theory is that whenever they hear someone start to discuss the issues, they cover their ears and make humming noises, the way my husband does when I say it is time to take a look at our 401(k)s.”
Gail Collins, The NY Times
Full article here.
DREAM five
- Pronunciation: drēm fīv
- Function: noun
- Usage: often attributive
1: an exercise I use to recall and record the five most memorable sensations from my night’s dream — compare rem sleep
—————————————————————————
1. There was a beautiful young man with dark hair who spoke French. We sat on a Terraced lawn overlooking the main avenue and the coast. I asked him what would be an appropriate gift for my hosts; he offered me several of the finest teas.
2. I did not recall the name of Todd’s friend who lives with Danya. This seemed to upset her somewhat. It upset me most.
3. Two families with young children arrived at the house. They were just stopping by to take showers. This made me feel uncomfortable and cramped.
4. Something about a church and an election.
5. I was accused of leaking potentially destructive evidence about Barack Obama’s character to The Economist.
PROSAIC
THERE IS NO THERE, THERE.
-Gertrude Stein, Everybody’s Autobiography
By describing the failed attempt to locate her childhood home in Oakland California, Gertrude Stein asks us to reconsider the intangible visions we often hold onto with fervor.
The obliqueness of the grammar allows ‘THERE’, the vision, to be something real or imagined in the past, present or future – removing its temporal qualities or the specificity of her search and forcing a more universal and inclusive reading.
In four words – she illuminates the space, distance, between the perceived and the hoped for and forces the question, “if THERE does not exist in its envisioned form, does it substantially frame our experience of HERE, and when we go in search of the THERE, are we denying the possibilities of HERE?”
Words to knit by.
WE LOVE
TO HATE
THE CURSE
OF LOVE
-Graffiti Artist, East Village NYC
Culture and Clarity
I don’t know the history of newspapers printing non-prose articles, in any section other than the “Arts” section, but I was extremely thrilled to see a pictorial article by one of my favorite artists in the Opinions section of the New York Times today.
a visual artist working in silhouette forms using paper, transparencies, light, and film (to name a few of her mediums) has manipulated reconstruction iconography to question the ways we view race and class in America.
And, in this thrilling article AUTUMN she again surprises me and forces me to make new insights – linking the circular experience of time (through the seasons) to give insight into the repetitive gestures of language and figures and colors that we often use to manipulate the opportunities and self-image of “conquered folks.”
Lately, I’ve had to confront my own assumptions about race. I grew up in Norwood, a small North Carolina town, where my culture (ultimately wrapped up in my race) was often mocked by white class mates. I remember in fourth grade we were studying North Carolina history and watching documentaries about our state. When we watched a video about religious practices, several white students decided that the cadence of black preachers and call & response of black parishioners was laughable. I had to endure weeks of heckling and indecent mimicry.
Having had to grow up in such an environment, I don’t usually anticipate non-blacks to embrace black culture – in fact for much of my late teens and early twenties I tried to deny black culture. So, when I see non-blacks wearing Obama paraphernalia and displaying signs, I greet it with an unhealthy amount of skepticism and unease. “Are you really supporting a ‘black’ man – or is this some part of your personal performance of liberalism?”
For me: there is more maturing to happen, more healing to happen. I look forward to having accumulated enough positive interactions and reflections to overcome the biases of my youth.
Language Responsibly
I have been terrified lately. The thought of being vulnerable – of sharing in a public space, like this blog, has made me second guess my work. I’m excited to be venturing back into this medium.
I was reading this afternoon about fear and darkness. Why is it that when in a space where our eyes have not quite adjusted, we start to use our other senses: smelling, touch, hearing to create (fill in the blanks) of the world around us. Why is it usually that, that world around us is populated with potential pitfalls? Why not potential opportunities?
I suppose as a great poet once reminded us:
We die.
That may be
the meaning of life.
yet she goes on, in the same poem, to remind us how we shape our existence:
But we do language.
That may be
the measure of our lives.
Tonight is the first of our US presidential debates. Let’s hope that both of the candidates chose their words well: words that will lead to actions which reflect the American people, words that will celebrate our civic responsibilities and words that will provide for our general welfare.
BREVITY
THE FURIES (featuring Barbara Stanwyck)
As you sow, so shall you reap. The families of America’s turn-of-the-century west struggle to define their identity through their connection to the land. Wealth and community mimic feudal world views, and the most obvious adversary is best equipped to end your means. An exceptionally convincing, aware and captivating portrayal of western womanhood.
The absurdity of life is that we even attempt to overcome the limits of our experience and weaknesses. Yet, it is through our desire to overcome the sum of our parts and through our commitment to love and fidelity that we celebrate the potential of the human spirit.
PAUL MCCARTHY: Central Symmetrical Rotation Movement Three Installations, Two Films
The span of time, when refracted, reveals a series of compelling “moment images.” The differences between those “moment images,” in time, distance and sound, can be mined for the surprising theatricality inherent in our attempt to move from point a to point c.
For Cory: Our Song
Latest edition to my blog– shout outs to my boo, man, boyfriend, main squeeze, Cory Hloska. Thanks for quenching my sweet tooth baby.
If you see Cory and I walking down the street, feel free to yell out the chorus to this song. We’ll gladly join you in the refrain.
Pilfered Content
Today is my day off from rehearsal. I’m associate directing the new musical FELA!, which is co-conceived, co-written, directed and choreographed by the imitable Bill T. Jones – a hero of mine, but I’ll write more on that another day.
So, I’m going to take this day off and leave you with an interview of Bill by the Wall Street Journal.
An African Giant’s Last Dance
By CAROL HYMOWITZ
July 18, 2008; Page W7C
Fela Anikulapo Kuti, the Nigerian Afro-beat musician and political activist who died of AIDS-related illnesses in 1997, was hugely popular throughout Africa in his lifetime and still has a devoted following today. In the U.S., however, he isn’t as well known as Bob Marley and other black global musicians. Choreographer Bill T. Jones, who runs his own modern-dance troupe and won a Tony last year for his choreography of the Broadway hit “Spring Awakening,” aims to change that. He’s directing — for the first time — and choreographing “Fela!,” a musical that will include live performances of Fela’s music, a fusion of jazz, funk and traditional African styles. Off-Broadway preview performances start on July 29. We talked with Mr. Jones recently about pidgin English, African dictatorships and directing.
WSJ: What do you want people who aren’t familiar with Fela to experience at the show?
Bill T. Jones: First, it should be an evening of good theater. Even though he was so concerned with issues of oppression and empowerment, Fela’s music on the surface is very entertaining. It’s “let’s get down and dance” music. When I listen to Fela, my hips begin moving; my body hears the music first.
Concrete Womb
Came across a Brooke Hodge’s blog post about the John Lautner exhibit at LA’s Hammer Museum, and it almost made me float out of my chair.
I’m always engaged by Modern architectural design that also envelops humanism. There’s something beautifully serene and inspiring about clean lines, uniformity and post-war building materials used to make spaces that reflect our communal experience and possible world views.
I know, I know – a bit of an academic rant, but it comforts me. I hope you find some comfort in it as well.
Subject: Punished for being HIV-Positive?
Dear Friend,
Can you imagine not being allowed to travel to another country or apply to become a legal resident because of a medical condition?
Under current U.S. law, our government is telling countless individuals living with HIV that they are banned from the United States. The discriminatory HIV Travel Ban prevents HIV positive individuals from entering the country or obtaining legal U.S. citizenship.
Right now a repeal to the ban is in the President’s Emergency Plan for AIDS Relief (PEPFAR) legislation – which, if passed, would abolish the ban and finally put an end to this unjust policy. But just as Congress is preparing to vote on PEPFAR legislation, anti-gay members of Congress are pushing to remove this critical provision so that the inhumane HIV Travel Ban remains a U.S. law.
Congress has a chance this year to finally abolish the travel ban and end this discriminatory policy! Please join me in asking them to stand up to anti-gay Senators who are trying to keep this unjust U.S. policy on the books. Just click below – it only takes a minute.
http://www.hrcactioncenter.org/campaign/hivtravelban?rk=VpdiYRYqOJjOW
ZOOM ZOOMS
…or THE SECRET LIFE OF TUK TUKS
I just can’t get enough of these single occupancy buggies.
It started with a chance spotting while waiting at the Austin airport, and now I have to take a photo every time I see them.
There’s just something about the scale of mobility and the implied reference: one motor vehicle to one person.
Engaging and disturbing.
QUOTEd BREVITY
“brevity” and “quoted” all in the same post? Hopefully my blog won’t implode.
If you over-consume food, you’ll be overweight, but if you over-consume Disney musicals, you’ll fall in love.
and
RollsRoyceRevenge commenting on Gawker’s Wall-E article:
“If anything, the problem with the film was that the human characters were too nice. One little weed in a shoe and they were ready to ditch their luxury mall in the sky and go back to hoeing black-eyed peas? Fuck that–there should have been a cabal fighting for the right to hover in the pretty purple nebula forever. Perhaps they should have named the nebula the Grimace Nebula, you know, in honor of the shakes.Best thing about this movie was Sigourney Weaver as the ship’s computer. Gee, Ellen Ripley, talk about turning into your M.O.T.H.E.R.”
Rosie O’Donnell Post for the Summer
yet another new addition to my blog:
stylistic improvisations on the blogging art of Rosie O’Donnell
of that
rambunctious
youngun
Hamburgers
lattes
or
shakes – overmilked
kisses melting on ice
another day in paradise
this is how internet rumors are started
todd caught me in an “indecent pose” during one of our video skype conversations the other day (if you want to chat with me on skype, my handle is niegelsmith).
believe it or not, we were discussing our grant proposal for Creative Capital.
if you work for Creative Capital… please give us some money. we like to make art stuff, and we’re so passionate about it, we take our shirts off.
some images don’t need descriptions
p.s. I love when artists appropriate popular iconography and give it an urgent new perspective
impossible is nothing
maybe if we both imagine hugging one another at the same moment… there will be a rip in the fabric of space and time… and we’ll actually embrace for an instant.
ok…
let’s try….
1, 2, 3…
confusion break bone
“Sufferhead must go. Jeffahead must come.”
– Fela Kuti
In rehearsal, our associate choreographer is most often the spiritual center for the company, and, as associate director, I most often keep a passionate distance – questioning and considering the choices we make.
This afternoon, with the associate choreographer gone, I became acutely aware of how distanced I had become in my relationship to the creative team. I found myself in a unique position to be a generating artist, critical outside eye and engaged nurturing force.
I hope to make room for more of this spiritual vulnerability as rehearsals continue.
life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness
The goal is to live in a world where one doesn’t have to compromise her spirit.
But, if one never compromises her spirit, is there ever any consideration for others? Is there every any struggle and subsequent reflection?
So, maybe the goal is to live in a world where we are constantly aware that we are pursuing our desires within a community, with an honest and acute respect for other’s pursuits.
DONT CALL ME! Text me baby.
The story has finally broken in a major US pub…
I really am surprised that it’s taken this long for a major study to find evidence that prolonged exposure of your brain to lithium ion and little polarized chips might mutate your cells.
Anywho, text me baby – I’ll keep my device at arms length.
Study: Cell Phones Could Be More Dangerous Than Cigarettes
Monday, March 31, 2008
A study by an award-winning cancer expert shows that cell phone use could kill more people than smoking, it is reported. According to the U.K.’s Independent newspaper, the study, headed by Dr. Vini Khurana, shows that there is a growing body of evidence that using handsets for 10 years or more can double the risk of brain cancer. Khurana — one of the world’s top neurosurgeons — based his assessment on the fact that three billion people now use the phones worldwide. That is three times higher than people who smoke. Smoking kills some five million globally each year. He warned that people should avoid using handsets whenever possible and called on the phone industry to make them safer. France and Germany have already warned against the use of mobile phones, especially by children, it is reported. The study is said to be the most damning indictment of cell phone use. According to the Independent, cancers take at least 10 years to develop, which has influenced earlier cancer studies showing relative safety when using cell phones. Click here to read the full report in the U.K.’s Independent Newspaper.
WHAT I DID FOR MY WINTER VACATION
todd is my friend.
sometimes we go places, like el tigre,
and we swim there in the fresh water,
and we cover ourselves in mud.
todd introduces me to his friends like Martin Churba.
Martin Churba likes to make pretty clothes for people.
He is a “maestro de textiles.” He put me in a fashion show.
i like todd’s friends.
sometimes i like to be by myself.
i get to think about things and to observe nature in its natural surroundings,
like when i went for a canoe adventure.
some people might say that todd is a jew.
some people might say that i am a darkie.
i like to think of us as a couple of fruits.
the end.
The Train
i gave up my seat on the train – to an older woman. she thanked me.
i dismissed her greeting, nonchalant.
i melted – having missed an opportunity to accept and truly receive her thanks.
i noticed my body. my jacket. my shirt. my hair.
The train pulled into the station.
i lost my balance and almost fell.
RETURN of the JEDI
APOLOGIES & EXCUSES
Almost two months have gone by… in a rehearsal room, in tech, in previews for a stunning new show Conversations In Tusculum and in a week-long workshop for the new musical FELA!.
I now return to my regularly scheduled blogging….
Hamlet: What a piece of work is a man, how noble in reason, how infinite in faculties, in form and moving how express and admirable, in action how like an angel, in apprehension how like a god!
the beauty of the world, the paragon of animals—
and yet, to me, what is this quintessence of dust? Man delights not me—
nor woman neither, though by your smiling you seem to say so.
Rosencrantz:
My lord, there was no such stuff in my thoughts.
Hamlet Act 2, scene 2, 303–312
The photo above is research for a new performance Todd and I have conceived, Weigh In. We plan to transform a defunct reading room in New York’s Humanities and Social Sciences Library into a boxing arena where visitors can join performers in a mixed-media battle between accurate and inaccurate information.
DANCE, DANCE, REVOLUTION
this is a song from Todd Shalom’s latest mix, Telenovela. enjoy.
TAKE YOUR CLOTHES OFF WHEN YOU DANCE – Frank Zappa
i went dancing this morning in therapy.
dropping it like it’s hot with the brooklyn girls, hitting arrhythmic markings with the williamsburgers, jitterbugging back in north carolina, ugly-dancing with kim and kaje, booty shaking at the now defunct roxy…
everyone is invited to my party. no more judgments.
BREVITY
Tonight, I’m starting a new addition to my blog: one-sentence responses to film, art, performance, etc. I’m thinking of it as a way to track initial thoughts, interactions or tangential associations. If you want to chime in, leave a one-sentence comment.
A compelling melodrama that delves into the passions and fears which manipulate our point-of-view.
Missing the mark a few times can often lead to hitting the mark eventually.
A brilliant indictment of the corporate impulse and manifest destiny, embodied by individual motivation and fulfillment.
WHAT I LOVE ABOUT THIS AFTERNOON
- Furniture made from scrap materials.
- My double button collar.
- My tall vanilla latte.
- A downpour, followed by clear skies.
- Post-Structuralism: A Very Short Introduction by: Catherine Belsey.
ACTION/REACTION
Notes on a performance.
- Prepare 415 personal secrets, desires or fears that I have shared with fewer than five people.
- Call each of the 415 contacts in my cell phone.
- With permission, record the conversation.
- Using a statistics randomizer, reveal one of the personal secrets, desires or fears to the person on the other end of “the line.” (Even though we aren’t connected by telephone lines anymore.)
- On my website, post a .pdf document of the 415 secrets, desires and fears, and post audio recordings of the conversations (erasing my voice from each conversation, leaving only the responses from the person called).
A GOOD FRIEND IS HARD TO FIND
                                        textiles & todd – 2007
REFLECTION
Self Indulgent Post for the New Year
On 12/31/07 Todd and I performed in Buenos Aires.
We shared with one another names, events and places that filled us with hope and anxiety in the past year and that we hope to carry with us into the new year. We wrote many of these reflections down on sheets of paper and burned them together.
In this action, which I consider to be a public acknowledgment of fear and courage, I felt vulnerable and empowered. Like the reminders of Ash Wednesday and meatless Friday night dinners during Lent, this performance gives me a sense of purpose and clarity that I reflect on every day.
ARRIVING in ARGENTINA
Argentina is beautiful. My driver he swerves between lanes, with no caution for the dotted white lines. He points out the futbol fields and the houses of worship with the glee of a school-boy.
It is 8 am and the sun is already dominating. The highway, the airport is flanked by a savannah dotted with a myriad of trees. South America. In minutes the trees are replaced with crude apartments. On the façade of these buildings I can 
see the handiwork of their creators, hundreds of men who have smeared plaster over concrete. La ciudad. I recognize from my guidebook, the Korean and Jewish neighborhood, my driver points out another church and we zip off the expressway, crossing two lanes at once onto the off ramp an into a city surprisingly awake and about for a Christmas morning.
Men grab their crotches and lean against bus stops to take the place of their spines. Women walk with ferocious vigor and purpose. I am at Todd’s.
“Gracias.”
“De Nada.”
My driver zooms off. I never caught his name.
I am now settled into Todd’s place – we each have a station to work at, at the table by the window, computers mirroring one another. I love the sharing and the autonomy of the moments.
We venture outside, Todd sharing with me his adopted home. Quickly, in the comfort of a massive foreign space — surrounded by another language and protected by a canopy of trees that line every avenue — we begin to return to our familiar proximity, living in and articulating our fears and dreams and the unique anxiety that surrounds us both. I am with Todd. I am at home.
QUOTEd
utterings with which I agree…
“I’ve always said I want the library to be a crossroads in the city’s intellectual and cultural life,” Mr. LeClerc said.
Full story on the Humanities and Social Sciences Library’s crumbling facade here.
1907
copyright 2007, New York Times
2006
SATURDAYS ARE…
You make it, I take it.
1. Nostalgic TV theme song meets poignant contemporary sensibilities…
2. Underage coed is taught to talk like a sailor in order to save famous dad’s career…
*Most prized pilfered content of the year.
on INSTITUTIONAL HOLIDAY PARTIES
                          unweildy public gatherings make me queezy
wrap me up
                          in old friends
                          or
                          a cup of hot tea
FAMILIA
          my baby brother is here.
          We watch movies
          and eat;
                              I enjoy taking him for granted.
mmmm…TASTY
This is my favorite recipe for a Saturday morning breakfast.
The key to fluffy pancakes is not to over mix the batter; it should not be beaten smooth. If serving these pancakes with bacon, reserve half a teaspoon of bacon drippings to grease the griddle instead of butter.
- 2 cups all-purpose flour, unbleached
- 2 teaspoons baking powder
- 1 teaspoon baking soda
- 1/2 teaspoon salt
- 3 tablespoons sugar
- 2 large eggs, lightly beaten
- 3 cups buttermilk
- 4 tablespoons unsalted butter, melted, plus 1/2 teaspoon for griddle, plus 1 tablespoon for serving
- 1 cup seasonal berries
- Maple Syrup to taste
COLLABORATIONS
Pablo Neruda
Fleas interest me so much
that I let them bite me for hours.
They are perfect, ancient, Sanskrit,
machines that admit of no appeal.
They do not bite to eat,
they bite only to jump;
they are the dancers of the celestial sphere,
delicate acrobats
in the softest and most profound circus;
let them gallop on my skin,
divulge their emotions,
amuse themselves with my blood,
but someone should introduce them to me.
I want to know them closely,
I want to know what to rely on.
SLEEP
Kj Swanson
Trying to sleep; What
happened to those nice things I
used to think about?
SOMETHING ON YOUR MIND
Karen Dalton’s In My Own Time
Yesterday any way you made it was just fine,
So you turned your days into night-time,
Didn’t you know, you can’t make it without ever even trying?
And something’s on your mind, isn’t it
Let these times show you that you’re breaking up your mind
Leaving all your dreams too far behind,
Didn’t you see, you can’t make it without ever even trying?
And something’s on your mind.
Maybe another day you’ll want to feel another way, you can’t stop crying,
You haven’t got a thing to say, you feel you want to run away
There’s no use trying, anyway.
I’ve seen the writing on the wall,
Who cannot maintain will always fall,
Well, you know, you can’t make it without ever even trying.
And something’s on your mind, isn’t it
Tell the truth now, isn’t it
And something’s on your mind, isn’t it
THANK YOU ANDREW WYETH
I am terribly afraid of intimacy and using language to explore my experiences.
Alas.
Focused reflection,
on a personal level,
is not a strength of mine.
In fact,
I often shrug opportunities
to discuss the events and moments
of my life.
Present readers,
Kj and Todd, excluded.
When I share with you, I feel stronger, more focused and loved. When I struggle to share with others or myself, I often feel inadequate, meandering, fool-hearted. This may be the greatest barrier or obstacle between me and creating new communities and truly investing in my current ones.
Maybe there is something unique in my relationship to Todd and Kj that I need to uncover in myself and the other folks around me.
DOCUMENTATION
I finally got it together enough to start documenting my theater work.
in this post: A few photos from my production of TOPDOG/UNDERDOG at Dartmouth College.
The title page of the play, written by Suzan-Lori Parks, reads:
The Players
Lincoln, the topdog
Booth (aka 3-card), the underdog
PUSHING FORWARD
Write everyday.
Observe. A photo. A sketch. A clipping.
Write down where you’ve come from. Write down where you went, which will, in a few moments, be where you’ve come from.Read. A passage. A script. A poem.
Write down what you’ve read. Write down what you are reading, because in a few moments, it will be what you’ve read.
On Directing: craft frees the artistic impulses.
Learn to shape moments. Have a gameplan based on ‘succesful’ forms/formulas.Be eager to use and know the language of adaptation.
FRAME the action. This is your lens, your point-of-view. This says to the audience, “here we go. This is how we’re going about this journey. Everything hencforth will be in reference to ‘this’.”